


The Hunters' Ascent

by ayperos5239



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Adult Language, Adult Situations, Angst, M/M, Mpreg, light Violence
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-07-31
Updated: 2014-10-16
Packaged: 2018-02-11 04:23:30
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 13,679
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2053467
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ayperos5239/pseuds/ayperos5239
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sam took Gabriel's death so hard, Dean had no choice but to ask god for help.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Grief

**Author's Note:**

> This here is my Disclaimer. Supernatural in no way shape or form belongs to me. That is all.

"I love you Sammy."

Those words rang in Sam's ear as he downed more of the whiskey he was holding. Those FUCKING words and that stupid smile…they never left his mind. Tears fell from his eyes unchecked as he thought about those scorch marks on the ground and that face, so still and lifeless.

Sam let out a blood curdling scream as he fell to the ground, looking around the room, hoping this was all a bad dream. When the realization dawned, yet again, that all this was reality, Sam drank more of the whiskey, hoping to drown his sorrows.

The door to the room opened and Dean tentatively walked in. He hadn't been able to get through to Sam in months. Ever since that damn Arch angel had died, Sam had been inconsolable, drinking and crying; sitting up in a room and screaming at his memories. Dean was going to give it one more shot before calling Castiel.

"Sam enough is enough." Dean said, worry painting his features.

"NO! I say when is enough." Sam slurred, taking another drink.

"Sammy, you're killing yourself." Dean took a step towards Sam.

"THEN LET ME DIE!" Sam responded, throwing the now empty bottle at Dean's head.

Dean moved his head just in time for the bottle to shatter when it came into contact with the wall, shards of glass flying everywhere.

"Sammy, you don't mean that." Sam shrugged at Dean's words.

"You don' kn-know that." Sam was hiccupping now, eyes drooping as his sleep deprived brain tried so hard to pass out, but Sam was nothing if not stubborn.

"Sammy, please don't do this to yourself…I can't watch you killing yourself over a douchebag angel." Dean had apparently said the wrong thing since the next thing he knew, he was being pinned up to the wall, a very drunk and angry Sam inches away from his face.

"FUCK YOU!" Sam couldn't think of anything else to say as he punched the wall near Dean's head. "Fuck you!" Sam let Dean drop to the ground.

Dean looked at Sam with tears brimming at his eyes. Even when Jessica had died Sam wasn't this bad and Dean wanted to say something, but decided against it. With a sigh that could break the hardest of hearts, Dean turned and walked out of the room, leaving Sam to open another bottle of whiskey and continue drinking.

XXX

Dean closed the door behind him and walked down the stairs to where Bobby was waiting for him. Wiping the tears from his eyes he looked at the older hunter and shook his head.

"It's getting worse." Bobby looked saddened by that.

"Castiel." Dean called, looking over at the aging hunter and hoping the angel answered his calls.

"Yes Dean?" Dean sighed in relief as he turned and looked at Castiel.

"I need your help." Said Dean.

"And what can I do for you Dean?" Castiel was truly curious.

"It's about Sam, he's killing himself."

"I will see what I may do." Castiel said and with a whoosh he was towering over the younger hunter.

Sam looked up at Castiel and glared, bringing to bottle to his mouth and noticing it immediately vanish.

"Give it back!" Sam stood, trying to look intimidating, but only looking more pathetic. "I said GIVE IT BACK!"

Castiel shook his head and took a step back, hoping to deter Sam from becoming violent. "I'll grab another then."

With a wave of his hand Castiel got rid of all the liquor in the room and sighed. "Sam this is not the proper way to grieve."

"HOW THE FUCK WOULD YOU KNOW?" Sam looked pissed.

"I have grieved for my brother as well." Castiel stated matter of factly.

"Yeah? Well Fuck you anyway." Castiel sighed at that, Sam was being petulant.

With a wave of his hand and a huff, Sam tried to run from the room only to find Castiel blocking his way. Sam tried to push Castiel away, only for the angel to hold his ground. When Castiel didn't move Sam resorted to punching him, and finally exhaustion took hold and he fell to the ground in a mound of tears.

Castiel disappeared and reappeared with Dean, who kneeled next to Sam and held him close, allowing his baby brother to cry. Dean didn't know why Sam was taking Gabriel's death so hard, but knowing Castiel he would be able to shed a little light on things.

An hour later found Sam finally asleep for the first time in days and Dean begrudgingly moved his brother towards the bed, laying him down and covering him with the blankets, hoping the stubborn ass would sleep for a day or so.

Walking out of the room Dean met up with Castiel and Bobby in the living room and sighed. "He's finally sleeping." Castiel nodded and took a seat next to the old hunter.

"I want to know why the reaction was so delayed." Bobby asked, looking around at the two occupants who seemed in thought.

"It was not delayed. He used his grief to hunt down and kill Lucifer, once that was finished, Sam had nothing to focus his grief on, so he turned it inward and it has been eating at him since." Dean looked like he understood.

The moment they had watched Gabriel's video telling them how to stop the end of days, Sam had been a different person. He wasn't the Sam that everyone had known, this Sam was out for blood, and it showed the moment he had tracked down and faced Lucifer head on.

"I'm only here for his blade." Sam said, wanting a piece of Gabriel back.

"I will give it to you, if you say yes." Sam didn't even hesitate and held out his hand.

"I want the blade first." Lucifer looked to think it over, but it would take an angelic force to kill him with any arch angel blade, so he handed the shining metal blade to Sam, who held it close to his chest and nodded his head.

Dean had walked into the room at that time, looking at Sam nodding, holding an angel blade to his chest and looking about ready to cry.

"SAMMY NO!" Dean was inconsolable as he ran towards Sam, they didn't have all of the horsemen rings, they wouldn't be able to do anything; but it was too late, as Sam had already said yes and Lucifer was already in the process of changing vessels.

Sam fought hard and finally he did win before looking at Dean sadly and plunging Gabriel's blade into his chest, and ignoring the pain, kept pushing, hearing Lucifer scream in the back of his mind.

Light came pouring out of his eyes and mouth, making Dean look away and with a burst of Grace, Sam lay on the ground, sword protruding from his body and the scorched marks of Lucifer's wings marring the floor, making Sam look like the Angel he was.

Dean walked over to Sam's still body on the ground, and tears streamed out. He had no strength left to cry or scream or…

And just as suddenly Sam opened his eyes and gasped, before looking down at his chest and blubbering like an idiot. "Get it out." He had said, but Dean wouldn't do that, if the injury hadn't somehow killed him, then removing the blade would.

Castiel was nowhere near able to perform any mojo so Dean pulled out his cell and called an ambulance.

Three surgeries and three months later and Sam was released, but his attitude didn't perk up, in fact it deteriorated. In the hospital he was mainly on pain killers and focusing on his physical therapy, but after Sam took to drinking, ignoring his meds, drinking some more and all he did was cry and drink, barely sleeping here and there.

Heaven had been chaos, but the moment Lucifer died, apparently god had made an appearance, brought Sam back to life and gave Castiel his mojo back, and now he was taking charge, weeding out the bad apples, but to Sam's dismay Gabriel was never brought back, and even Dean had to wonder why.

"So why is Sam taking this so hard?" Castiel sighed, knowing the question would eventually be asked.

"He was Gabriel's mate, and they had a completed bond." Dean looked like he might vomit so Castiel elaborated. "They did not engage in sexual congress Dean, when would they have had the time? Their bond was deeper than that. They were bound Grace to Soul and now that Gabriel is dead Sam will follow at a slower and more self-destructive pace."

Dean didn't want to hear it, Sammy wasn't going to die, if he was going to die, he would be dead already cause god wouldn't bring Sam back only to watch him die like this.


	2. Favors

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all so much for your wonderful comments.

Dean sat staring into space, thinking about what he could do to help his brother. Sam was getting worse, even now with no liquor for him to drink his speech was slurred and the white of his eyes were yellow. There were bags under his eyes, and he had lost so much weight. Dean knew without a doubt that Sam was dying.

"Castiel." Dean called, knowing the angel would answer.

"Yes?" Dean looked up and tried to smile at his angel.

"I need you to take me to god." Castiel looked shocked and for the first time in his entire life on earth, Castiel laughed.

"I cannot take you to him." Dean shrugged and grabbed for his gun. "If you can't take me to him, then I'll take myself to him." And with that Dean aimed the gun to his head.

"Dean, no…please do not do this, he may not allow your return to earth again." Dean shrugged and cocked the gun.

"Have you seen him?" Dean asked, lowering the gun for a moment. "Have you seen what the hell he's going through all because your daddy won't bring Gabriel back? I'd rather be dead and have Sam happy, then alive and know Sam's suffering so much."

Castiel sighed, and knowing how much trouble he could get into, grabbed for Dean and vanished.

Dean looked around and was surprised at what he saw. He was in an office building, of all things, with one measly desk in the center. No windows and no light, but the room was surprisingly not dark.

"Hello Castiel." Castiel bowed to his father and took a step back, letting Dean walk closer towards the figure turned away from them.

"Are you god?" Dean asked, not sure he could get his hopes up. "Yes Dean, I am god." Dean sighed in relief.

"I have a favor." God turned and looked at Dean and the hunter smiled at the familiar looking person standing there.

"And what's this favor you seek?" The familiar person smiled back at the hunter.

"I want to help Sam, and the only way to do that is to bring Gabriel back." Dean stated taking a step forward.

"I could do that." God answered and walked closer to the hunter.

"Will you?" Dean asked, hopeful.

"I don't know if I should."

"You brought Sam back, you brought him back from the brink of death, and you won't help him? Did you bring him back just to have me watch him die?" Dean looked pissed.

"No I did not Dean, but Gabriel rebelled and left heaven. He killed many people." God looked saddened by this fact.

"Yeah, and at the end he died protecting humans. I think that's worth redemption don't you?" Dean asked daring god to disagree.

"You are right, he did a great many things to redeem himself, but you have not given me a good enough reason to bring him back."

"How about the fact that you brought Zachariah back, even though he was worse than Gabriel could ever be." God laughed at that statement and nodded.

"Okay, I'll bring him back, but if he dies he stays dead do you understand me?" Dean looked relieved and nodded.

God nodded and snapped his fingers and to Dean's great delight, there stood Gabriel, looking saddened and absolutely confused.

Gabriel turned towards God then and sighed. "I didn't deserve to be brought back."

"I know." God said smiling at his arch-angel. "But Sam needs you and Dean begged me to bring you back for him." Gabriel looked pleased then.

"Thank you Dean." Dean waved away the gratitude and looked at Gabriel with a straight face. "Sam is dying." Gabriel felt his stomach drop at those words.

"Am I needed here?" Gabriel asked god, hoping his father would allow his leave.

"You are not needed, but when I call, you come." Gabriel nodded and bowed to his father.

"Let's go then Dean-o" Dean nodded and walked towards Castiel, who looked shocked at what had just taken place. "Follow Cas." Gabriel nodded and the three of them left heaven, not noticing god's smiling face.

XXX

Dean and Castiel were the first to arrive at Bobby's, followed very closely by Gabriel. Bobby saw the dead angel and sat bolt upright. "What the hell?" Bobby asked, grabbing for his gun, only to be stopped by Dean. "That's Gabriel, I watched him come back myself Bobby. He's here to help Sam."

Bobby sighed but put the gun down and watched Gabriel search the house with his grace before turning and walking up the stairs.

"How did this happen?" Bobby asked, watching Dean walk into the kitchen for a beer.

"Dean asked god for a favor, and god said yes." Bobby nodded, not really understanding how this was even remotely possible but accepting it for the time being.

Dean walked into the living room then and handed Bobby a beer before taking a drink of his own. "I just hope this helps Sam." Dean said, looking at the stairs longingly.

XXX

Gabriel walked up the stairs and looked at the door hiding his mate and couldn't help but let the tears fall. How Sam had lived this long with a broken bond was beyond him, but now he was going to help mend the broken hunter.

His resolve strengthening, Gabriel opened the door and the smell of stale alcohol and sweat hit him like a ton of bricks. With a snap of his fingers, the room was clean, the air fresh and inviting and the body on the bed stirred a bit.

Gabriel walked into the room and towards the bed, looking down at the sleeping form of his mate. Sam looked terrible, eyes sunken and hollow, skin three shades too pale, hair matted from lack of bathing and he seemed to have lost a good amount of weight.

Taking a deep breath, Gabriel sat at the edge of the bed and placed a hand on Sam's cheek. Healing Sam was going to take months, and Gabriel so prayed that god would not call him until his mate was completely well again.

"Sam?" Gabriel called, gently trying to wake his sleeping mate. "Sammy love, wake up." Sam groaned but opened his eyes to the blaring light and winced. Gabriel bent forward and kissed Sam's eyes, helping him to adjust to the light faster. "There we are." Sam looked away and tears fell from his eyes.

"Not real." Gabriel felt his heart shatter. How many hallucinations had Sam had in the last months? How many times had his mind given him hope, only to crush it?

"I'm real Sam." Sam turned away and flinched at Gabriel's touch. Gabriel was dead and Sam knew this. God hadn't bothered to bring him back, no one but Sam seemed to give a damn about the arch-angel.

"God didn't care enough to bring you back; God didn't care…God…" Sam was sobbing again. His eyes hurt so damn much, but he continued to cry.

Gabriel reached under the taller man and lifted him up and into his arms, holding the sobbing mess of a hunter. Sam continued to cry, not knowing how long he had holed himself up in this room, barely eating, barely moving, and he didn't care. Nothing mattered without his angel.

"Shhhhh Sammy." Gabriel shushed, hoping to calm the hunter down, and eventually it seemed to have worked.

Hiccupping once or twice Sam finally calmed down enough to look at the person holding him. He'd hallucinated Gabriel so many times, but none of the hallucinations had ever held him, or comforted him, none of them cared enough to.

"Gabriel?" The angel smiled sadly and nodded.

"That's what I've been trying to tell you Sammy." Sam buried his face into Gabriel's neck and took a long breath. "I missed you."

Gabriel chuckled at that. "I've noticed. Want to take a bath with me?" Sam nodded, suddenly feeling filthy.

Gabriel snapped and transported them to a safe house he had, long ago, with a Jacuzzi tub. Filling the bathtub, Gabriel started undressing the hunter slowly, looking at the protruding ribs and yellow tinted skin, Sam was severely sick but Gabriel was there now and Sam would be alright.

With a snap of his fingers Gabriel undressed himself and gently maneuvered Sam into the water, listening to the hunter sigh with contentment, before getting in behind him.

Gabriel bathed Sam slowly and gently, getting the filth off his body and detangling his hair, before having Sam lean back and relax against the angel.

"I will never leave you again." Gabriel promised and listened to Sam's breathing, quiet and content.

"Let's go Sammy, we need to feed you." Sam nodded, not really trusting his voice, and with Gabriel's help got out of the bathtub.

A snap of Gabriel's fingers and they were both dressed in black t-shirts and sweat pants. "Do you want to eat here or at Bobby's? Dean's really worried about you." Sam shrugged; he didn't care as long as the angel was with him. "Bobby's it is then." Sam nodded and braced himself.

Gabriel grabbed a hold of Sam and together they vanished only to reappear in the room they had vacated not too long ago. "Let's go Sam" Sam nodded and allowed the angel to walk him out of the room and down the stairs to meet with the people he had ignored and outright insulted.

"Sammy?" Dean asked running over to his brother only to have Sam shy away and hide, as best as he could, behind Gabriel.

"Give him time Dean, he's very sick." Dean nodded and led the two towards the kitchen, knowing Castiel and Bobby would follow.

True to his prediction Cas and Bobby joined them in the kitchen and Watched Gabriel settle Sam into a seat before snapping his fingers and producing a feast of food.

"Go on then." Gabriel said looking a little miffed that no one had started eating yet. Castiel sat next to Dean and Bobby took a seat to the left of Sam. Sam flinched but didn't move as he watched Gabriel take his own seat to the right of him.

"What looks good Sammy?" Gabriel asked, hoping the young hunter would finally answer him.

"Chicken looks good." Sam said looking at the rotisserie style chicken that graced the table.

"Chicken it is." Gabriel smiled and cut a decent size piece off for Sam and placed it in front of him.

"Tell me if it tastes good." Sam nodded and looked down at the food before grabbing his fork and picking the chicken apart, hoping to find a bite that looked good enough to eat.

Gabriel, seeing this, grabbed Sam's fork and decided he was going to start feeding the hunter, knowing that Sam would eat anything given to him by his mate.

That's when everyone else decided that maybe they should be eating too, and grabbed a plate full of food, including Castiel, and they started tentatively picking at it.

They all hated seeing Sam like this, but Gabriel seemed to know what he was doing.

Sam opened his mouth to the first bite of chicken and potato, humming slightly as the taste permeated his mouth.

"It's very good." Sam said opening his mouth again as Gabriel brought up another mouth full of food.

"I'm glad you like it. Eat as much as you like." Gabriel said, smiling and loading up another forkful of food.

Dinner went by silently, Dean picking at his food, Castiel having finished his food and Bobby glaring holes into his now empty plate. Sam seemed to be the only one still eating, being prompted by a smiling Gabriel to eat as much as he would like.

Two slices of chicken, three spoons of potatoes and a bit of broccoli later and Sam was finally shaking his head at the bites of food that Gabriel had made for him. "Drink some juice and then we can go lie down." Sam nodded and took the glass of juice, downing it in one go.

Gabriel stood then and helped Sam out of his own seat before walking them out of the kitchen. "I'll be back to explain once Sam is sleeping soundly." Gabriel said, snapping his fingers and clearing the table before walking the exhausted hunter up the stairs.-

Gabriel walked Sam into the room and laid him down on the bed, kissing his forehead and petting his hair until the hunter's eyes started to droop. "Go ahead Sammy love, I'll be here when you wake up." Sam nodded, not being able to do anything other than close his eyes and let sleep take hold of him.

Walking out of the room and down the stairs, Gabriel made his way back towards the kitchen and snapped his fingers again, conjuring some cookies and coffee for everyone, before taking his seat.

He watched everyone take a sip of their coffees, including Castiel, and smiled at them all. "He's my bond mate." Gabriel started his explanation with the obvious.

"What does that mean exactly? I mean Castiel kind of tried to explain it but I'm not sure he was comfortable enough with it." Dean asked, taking a cookie and biting it angrily.

"Every angel has a mate all their own out there, and since there aren't very many of us and there are an abundance of creatures out there, it's hard to pin point exactly who our mates are. I was lucky when I found Sam and immediately my grace called out to him and started bonding to him. Sam's soul was just as happy, and devoured everything my grace gave to it. Every day this went on, our bond grew stronger, until the day I died for him.

"By dying for him I completed the bond, and because of that Sam was now living his life with a broken bond, which eats at the soul and slowly kills it. Sam's been sick because of the broken bond." Gabriel tried to explain but didn't seem to have done a very good job since Bobby and Dean still looked confused.

"So…this bond…" Gabriel shot Dean a dirty look.

"No Dean I did NOT sex up your brother, if I had he would have already been dead." Gabriel tried to explain again.

"What the…I don't get it." Dean honestly had no idea why his brother was dying because of this dick.

"Think of it this way, my grace was providing your brother with everything he needed, like a blood transfusion, now cut that off and the person dies. I died which cut off the supply to your brother and his soul was destroying him from the inside, trying to get to me." Dean winced at the explanation.

"So what you're saying is that Sam's soul was addicted to your grace?" Gabriel sighed, it was like talking to a monkey.

"No Sam's soul is not addicted. Imagine if you had to live without Sam." Dean squinted, wondering where Gabriel was going with this, but nodded.

"Now multiply that feeling by 1000 and you'll barely scratch the surface of how badly your brother and I need to be near each other."

"So what was that whole thing about the transfusion thing?" Gabriel wanted to pull his hair out.

"It's not a transfusion for the love of father. How did you feel when your brother died?" Dean looked ready to puke.

"Yeah, there you go that's about what the bond feels like. You feel like you're going to die unless the other person is with you, now multiply that feeling by…"

"I know, I know, 1000 blah, blah. So what was that about the transfusion thing?" Gabriel threw a cookie at Dean then.

"My grace was giving Sam love and affection and someone to turn to, granted without him knowing it at the time, and when I died his soul craved that connection." Dean looked like he was finally beginning to understand what Gabriel was saying.

"So there was no transfusion or addiction?" Gabriel threw his hands up in a huff and vanished with a whoosh, leaving behind a very confused Bobby, a moderately confused Castiel and a smirking Dean.


	3. What about a transfusion?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dean may not be the easiest person to explain something to, but at least he has a sense of humor about it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy you all enjoy this. Thank you all so much.

"So how is it that angels even have functioning bonds, considering that to complete it you have to die." Dean asked once it looked like Gabriel wasn't going to come back. Dean didn't want to have to deal with the arch angel right now.

"It is not dying that did it; it was the act of dying that completed the bond. In order to complete an angelic bond the angel must complete an act of complete selflessness. The bond would not have completed had Gabriel thought of himself even in the slightest while dying."

Dean looked contemplative. "So what you're saying is that Gabriel died completely and utterly for my brother?"

"That is what I am saying." Castiel said reaching for a cookie and taking a tentative bite.

"This is quite good, what is it?" Castiel wondered, taking another bite of the cookie.

"It's oatmeal raisin." Gabriel said, walking back into the kitchen and taking a seat.

"I thought you'd left in a huff." Bobby asked, looking at the angel curiously.

"I went to check on my mate, I didn't leave in a huff." Gabriel said, grabbing a cookie and glaring at the offending treat.

"You so left in a huff. Admit it I pissed you off." Dean looked smug and Gabriel finally conceded.

"Yes Dean you pissed me off, you happy now?" Dean smirked and nodded.

"So Gabriel, you died just to save Sammy?" Dean asked, looking a little more accepting of the angel.

"Yeah I did. I wanted him to live a life without saying yes, but you know…" Gabriel shrugged and made himself another cup of coffee, sipping it slowly.

"So what the hell was that bullshit you pulled with us in Broward County and TV land? I won't even bring up how badly you had Sam and I at each other's throats." Dean asked, taking a long drink of his coffee.

"I wanted to be the one to kill you in Broward County because if Sam was focused on finding me, the apocalypse would never have started." Dean looked confused as Gabriel tried to explain.

"Look, the reason why Sam broke the last seal was because of his obsession with finding and killing Lilith, and that's not even including that bitch Ruby, but if I had been the one to kill you, his obsession would have been directed towards me, he would have hunted me down, and the last seal wouldn't have been broken." Gabriel explained, looking longingly at his coffee.

"And what about TV land, you were begging us to say yes." Gabriel looked up and sighed.

"I lied. I had hidden you from everyone in there. I made sure the only one who'd be able to find you would be me, and when Castiel found you I got shit scared, so I threw him out. I honestly didn't want you to say yes. If I had kept you there, no one would have been able to find you, and you wouldn't have been able to say yes."

Dean sighed and stood to get a beer only to have one appear in his hands. "You know, us mortals have to do things for ourselves sometimes." Gabriel smirked at that.

"Not while I'm around Dean-o." Dean smiled softly at Gabriel before sitting down and taking a long drink of his beer.

"I hate this." Bobby said, breaking the silence once again.

"What do you hate?" Gabriel asked, looking at the aging hunter.

"This coffee, it tastes like ass." Gabriel nodded and with a snap of his fingers changed Bobby's coffee into a beer.

"Thanks." Bobby looked at his alcoholic beverage and lost his liking for it immediately, remembering the drunken mess that Sam had become over the past months.

"I won't let him drink again." Gabriel said, looking at Bobby and understanding the thoughtful look the hunter seemed to be giving his beer.

"I figured as much, but it kinda ruined beer for me, seeing how bad Sam had it." Bobby said, putting his beer on the table. Dean looked at his own beer and tears pricked his eyes.

"How bad was he?" Gabriel asked, knowing he was going to hate the answer. Neither Dean nor Bobby wanted to relive that, so Castiel sighed and grabbed a cookie to fiddle with.

"He was bad Gabriel. The moment you died, he tracked down and killed Lucifer, a story best left for Sam to tell you. After, though, he drank at least three bottles of whiskey a day, which is a miracle considering that much alcohol intake could have easily killed him. He would scream at his memories, occasionally crying out for you. He was violent towards anyone who came near him, and on one occasion I had to separate him from Dean, considering the damage he had done to his brother.

"There were times he was calm enough to look at the wall and smile a little, maybe having fond memories of you, but other times he was throwing bottles and furniture about, fighting his memories of you, calling out to you and swearing profanities at the memories of you he did have.

"He stopped eating a week ago, though before that he didn't intake much; and the little he did eat would be vomited back up near immediately. He was not taking your death very well, but there was little we could do. He would not allow us near him, and if we disobeyed his order to stay away, he would become violent.

"There were times he tried to take his own life, but for unknown reasons, he was unsuccessful. Dean had tried to speak to him, only to be thrown from the room or attacked, and Bobby gave up trying months ago. There was nothing we could do."

Castiel looked at the cookie in his hand then, and started crumbling it and playing with the raisins, hoping to find answers in the crumbs on the table. Gabriel was shocked silent, he knew a broken bond was bad, but this went above and beyond anything he had heard of happening. Something in Sam made the broken bond stronger than it should have been, making him sicker as the days went by, and Gabriel would get to the bottom of it eventually.

"I suggest everyone get a good night's rest, since tomorrow is the start of Sam's healing." Gabriel said before snapping his fingers and clearing the table of its mess.

Bobby was the first to stand and leave, not wanting to wait around much longer. The events of the past months had finally caught up to him and Bobby was so very tired.

Dean and Castiel looked at Gabriel then and noticed the angel looked devastated, but neither could do anything about it.

"You and Sam have the only other available room, so Cas and I will take the living room." Dean stated matter of factly only for Gabriel to give him an annoyed look.

"I will make you a room; I don't think Bobby will care." And with a snap of his fingers, the house rearranged to allow a third room, completely furnished, and waved Dean and Castiel away. He wanted some time alone, to think on things and figure out what had caused Sam to get so bad.

Once Dean and Castiel were gone, Gabriel looked at the cup in front of him and let his tears fall. Fiddling with the edge of the cup, Gabriel got to thinking about everything that had happened. Sam had damn near killed everyone in his little group, just because Gabriel had die, and that was unusual for the type of bond Sam and he had.

Filling his cup and taking sip, Gabriel used his grace to check on Sam and was relieved to discover the hunter still asleep; there was too much on Gabriel's mind right now and he didn't think he'd be able to give Sam the proper attention until he got to the bottom of whatever had made his mate so devastated.

Taking another sip, he looked up and saw, with blurred vision from crying, God sitting in a chair opposite of him. "Wanna talk about it?" Gabriel looked shocked but nodded.

"So, what's got you so…pissy?" God asked, smiling at the look of shock on Gabriel's face.

"Sam shouldn't have taken it so bad." Gabriel stated plainly, not really wanting to let on how confused he was that his father was sitting right in front of him.

"It doesn't matter what I said in heaven, I wasn't about to let you rot in purgatory. I know you messed up, but the good thing is that you managed to find free will through it all." God said, completely ignoring what Gabriel had said about Sam.

"Then why did you wait until Sam was so far gone?" Gabriel asked, truly confused now.

"I needed to make sure." God answered as though it was clearly obvious.

"Make sure of what exactly?" God sighed and looked at his favorite son.

"I've had plans for Sam and Dean for a while now. Since they were born I bound two of my angels to them, you for Sam and Castiel for Dean."

"But the only reason to do that would be…" Gabriel looked a little awed at his father's explanation.

"Yes, I wish them to Ascend."

"So is that why Sam took the broken bond so badly?" Gabriel asked hopefully, only to have his hopes dashed by the answer.

"No. It doesn't matter at what age the bond started or completed, a broken bond has never caused that bad of a reaction. There was underlying emotional distress that caused it." God answered, waving his hand and making himself a cup of chocolate milk.

"So…do you know what the underlying distress was so that I can help him better?" God nodded at the question, poofing into existence a cookie and dunking it into his chocolate milk.

"But you won't tell me, will you?" God shook his head and took a bite of his cookie and smiled.

"See, if I hadn't made humans chocolate chip cookies wouldn't exist and then I would be sad." Gabriel smiled at that and nodded, he did enjoy his sweets after all.

"I won't be in need of you for quite a while Gabriel, so you don't have to worry about running home any time soon, but I need you to make quick work of Sam's recovery. I want him and Dean well enough to Ascent in ten years' time, do you understand me?" Gabriel nodded and took a sip of his coffee before turning to his father once more.

"I'm not allowed to tell them your plans am I?" God looked up, a piece of cookie hanging from his mouth, and nodded.

"I don't want them to know just yet. I'll let you know when to tell them." God answered, eating the rest of his cookie and drinking his milk.

"Okay then father." Gabriel was at a standstill. He knew why Sam had over reacted, but he didn't exactly know why Sam had over reacted.

"Go to bed, cuddle your mate and fall asleep. You need sleep too you know." Gabriel smiled but nodded, bowing his head to his father before disappearing from the kitchen.

God smiled at where Gabriel had been sitting before he too vanished, going back to heaven and continuing his discipline of the idiot angels who took things too far.

XXX

Gabriel walked into the room Sam was sleeping in and looked at his mate, who even in sleep seemed haunted and in pain.

Moving Sam gently, Gabriel worked his way behind the hunter and placed a hand over Sam's hips, holding him close and breathing in the scent of his mate and gasping as realization dawned on him. Immediately Gabriel knew what had caused Sam to over react, and that thought both eased his mind and caused him to weep uncontrollably.


	4. So much for waiting

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I know I love you and no matter what you say, this relationship is far from brand new. I want this.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for your continued support in this story. Hugs and such.

The next morning when Gabriel woke up, the first thing he noticed was a pair of eyes on him. Looking at Sam and confirming the hunter was still asleep; Gabriel looked towards the door and saw Castiel standing there with a worried expression on his face.

"I heard you weeping last night." Castiel said, not really one for subtle.

"Yes I wept." Gabriel whispered back, not wanting to wake the hunter quite yet.

"Why did you weep brother?" Gabriel looked devastated as he remembered what he had learned last night.

"I learned why Sam took our broken bond so poorly." Castiel looked at his brother then and nodded.

"So what caused it?" Gabriel opened his mouth to respond but was stopped by a groan from Sam.

"I will tell you later brother, for now I must tend to my hunter." Castiel nodded and vanished from the room.

"Good morning Sammy love." Gabriel said to his mate as Sam's eyes finally opened and focused on him.

"Good morning Gabriel." Sam said turning to cuddle into Gabriel that much more. Gabriel smiled and held Sam close, not really having it in him to let the hunter go.

"I would love to lie here all day, but we have breakfast to eat." Sam nodded and sat up in bed.

"Let's brush our teeth and head down to the kitchen, yes?" Sam smiled brightly and stood up to run to the bathroom.

Teeth brushed and faces washed, Sam and Gabriel made their way down the stairs and into the kitchen. Everyone was already awake and breakfast had already been laid out.

Sitting down and dragging Sam down with him, Gabriel looked at the assortment of food before settling on some fruit for himself and the hunter.

"Eat." Gabriel commanded and watched Sam grab a fork and stab unpleasantly at the fruit.

"Do you want something else?" Sam nodded and bit his lip shyly.

"What can I get you?" Sam thought about it a bit before smiling brightly and looking at Gabriel.

"I want donuts and milk." Gabriel smiled back and snapped his fingers, presenting Sam with a multitude of different donuts to eat.

"Your wish is my command." Sam's eyes brightened and he grabbed for a glazed donut. Taking a giant bite out of the donut, he moaned and closed his eyes, to savor the flavor. No one dared comment on Sam's new eating habit and besides, who were they to complain, since everyone was just happy to see the younger man eating.

"Sleep well Sammy?" Dean asked, hoping Sam would finally answer him. Sam looked over at Dean and immediate averted his eyes. "Y-yeah." He said shyly, not trusting himself to say much more.

"Good." Dean answered, smiling at his brother to reassure Sam that he was not mad in the slightest. Sam smiled back and took another bite of his donut, before downing some milk.

Gabriel adjusted Sam on his lap before grabbing a fork and eating a bit of the fruit laid out before him. Slowly Sam finished off about three donuts before his stomach could not hold anymore and he stretched to wake his body a bit more.

"Want some coffee?" Gabriel asked between bites of his breakfast. Sam nodded and Gabriel poofed him up some before continuing with his breakfast. Sam took the cup and sipped at it, sighing happily as the warm liquid making its way down his throat.

Dean looked at Castiel with a worried expression, silently asking what had happened the night before. Castiel shook his head, indicating he did not yet know, before turning back towards the table and glaring at his empty cup of coffee.

Gabriel laughed at the look on the younger angel's face, before snapping his fingers and refilling everyone's cups to their liking.

Breakfast finished uneventfully, with Sam trying to bury his face in his cup of coffee every time someone looked at him. He knew he was being ridiculous but he couldn't get passed what he'd done to them all. He'd yelled and been irrational and on many occasions he'd beaten the ever loving shit out of his brother, who seemed to still be smiling up at him even now, knowing what Sam had done.

Sam knew a part of him couldn't control what he was doing. He was devastated when Gabriel had died, and he had just been so overwhelmed with it all that he lashed out continuously, but now that he was rational enough to think about it, Sam didn't know why he had been so inconsolable, but maybe Gabriel would be able to help him figure it out, slowly.

"Sammy, wanna join me in the living room for a movie?" Sam looked hesitant, but with a little push from Gabriel he nodded, stood and walked out of the kitchen with his brother.

Bobby left as well, wanting to spend a little time with the brothers now that Sam was feeling a bit better, leaving Castiel and Gabriel to look at each other with an awkward silence between them.

"It is later and I wish for that explanation." Castiel said taking a sip of his coffee and looking expectantly at Gabriel.

"He was in his cycle." Gabriel explained and Castiel looked up with a shocked expression.

"Oh SHIT, I'm so sorry." Castiel sounded so undignified talking like that.

"It's not your fault." Castiel was shaking now.

"I should have known; I should have helped him through it." Castiel sounded so scared.

"It wasn't your fault Castiel. You didn't know." Gabriel tried to reassure but Castiel was crying now, tears falling from his face slowly and unchecked.

"I SHOULD HAVE HELPED." Castiel yelled out, causing the occupants of the living room to come flooding into the kitchen.

Sam immediately went to Gabriel, and sat on a chair next to his angel, while Dean ran to Castiel, holding him as the angel fell into him, sobbing.

"What the hell happened?" Dean asked, turning accusing eyes to Gabriel.

"I found out why Sam took the broken bond so bad, and I told Castiel. He's not taking it any better than I did when I found out."

"And what made Sam go so loopy, no offence Sammy." Sam smiled at Dean and looked at Gabriel expectantly.

"He was going through his cycle." Gabriel explained, watching Bobby take a seat next to Sam.

"And what's a cycle?" Bobby asked then, looking back and forth between the two angels.

"A cycle is what happens to an angel's mate when they are ready for a family." Gabriel tried to explain, without actually explaining it.

"Okay and what does that do to make things so much worse?" Dean asked, helping Castiel take a seat and rubbing comforting circles on the angel's back.

"The cycle confuses the body, makes them burn for a family, and when the bond is broken, the cycle drives them insane." Gabriel explained.

"What do you mean, it burns for a family? Sammy has a family." Dean looked perplexed.

"The cycle makes your body burn to carry a child." Castiel specified, looking at Dean, tears finally drying up.

"When Sam was in his cycle, he was still fighting the broken bond, but his body was also screaming at him to have a child. He wanted to have a baby so bad that his body started to rebel. The alcohol probably helped dull the pain he was in, because when a cycle goes unheeded, the body literally feels like it's on fire. Sam was in so much pain he couldn't even think straight and it didn't help that his soul was killing him trying to find and get to me."

Dean looked like he was finally starting to understand but still had a quite a bit of questions.

"Why did Castiel cry when you told him this?" Gabriel sighed and tears pricked his eyes. Sam, seeing this, started kissing Gabriel gently, hoping to help him calm down.

Gabriel placed a hand on Sam's face, and gently kissed his lips, hoping to relay some of his love through that kiss. Sam sighed into the kiss, holding onto Gabriel for dear life.

"Gabriel." Castiel said, looking at Sam with intrigue.

Gabriel broke the kiss and smiled at Sam before looking at Castiel. "What is it Castiel?"

"Dude, don't make out with my brother here, if you want to do things like that you need to go to your freaking room." Dean said, looking a little nauseous at having to watch that.

"That is not what I had intended to say." Castiel said looking over at Sam again.

"Then what the hell were you gonna say, cause there's no way I wanna be watching that." Bobby said looking at Castiel for answers.

"Sam's cycle has not ended yet." Castiel said taking a sip of his coffee and looking around at the occupants of the room.

Gabriel buried his face in Sam's neck and took a long breath, smelling his mate fully. His eyes went wide and he pulled away from Sam to look at him fully. "You're right Castiel." Gabriel announced, continuing to stare at Sam with adoration and love.

"So what now?" Dean asked, looking at Gabriel like he'd grown an extra head.

"It's up to Sam." Gabriel said, finally looking towards Dean.

"I want it." Sam said, not even blinking.

"Are you sure? It's a lot of pain, and you're still not fully recovered. Me being here will ease the pain you feel from the cycle, you don't have to do it just to…" Sam stopped him with a look.

"Obviously my body wants it, and there's no way in hell that I don't love you, so…" Gabriel shook his head.

"This relationship is very new." Sam scoffed, a bit of his former self coming through.

"We've been bonded for years; just because we haven't had sex doesn't make this relationship new." Gabriel had to agree with that but he was still unsure.

"Before we leave the two of you to discuss my becoming an uncle, what the HELL is going on here?" Dean sounded irritated.

"Sam has one week or so left of his cycle, which means he still burns for a family." Castiel elaborated, hoping to help Dean understand.

"Yeah? Well why the hell did you two cry when you found out?" Castiel sighed.

"Because, Dean, this cycle happens only twice, if Gabriel had lost this chance, he may never have gotten another." Dean nodded, this explained why Gabriel was sad, but it did nothing to explain Castiel's reaction.

"I was filled with sorrow at the concept as well." Dean still didn't understand, what did Sam and Gabriel missing an opportunity for a baby have to do with Castiel.

"I am an angel Dean; I feel the pain of my brothers just as if I were living through them myself." Castiel said, hoping to have the matter settled.

"Fine, whatever." Dean said, standing to leave.

"Dean if we decide to do this, you are not allowed to interrupt, no matter what you hear." Dean looked a little green but nodded and left the kitchen, Bobby and Castiel following him close behind.

"Sam, I understand the needs of your body, but I also don't want you to rush into anything only to regret it." Sam looked sullen.

"I know you're worried Gabriel, but I promise I will never regret anything that happens between us." Gabriel sighed, he wanted to believe Sam, he really did, but things were not at their best right now and he worried.

"Please understand…" Gabriel began only to be cut off by a heated kiss.

"Please don't deny me this." Sam said, looking so sure of his answer that Gabriel melted and gave in. With a snap of his fingers they were both in the room.

XXX

Dean fumed all the way into the room. There was so much he didn't understand and it was starting to annoy the crap out of him.

"Dean please calm down." Dean looked up at Castiel and huffed before sitting on the couch.

"I just don't get it." Dean said, looking like a lost little boy.

"What don't you understand, I will explain it."

"How did you two know he wasn't done with his cycle?" Dean asked, needing to know.

"His eating habits and how he clung to Gabriel." Castiel answered easily.

"What do his eating habits have to do with this cycle thing?"

"When the bond broke, Sam became self-destructive, and refused to eat, which caused his body to rebel, hence why he drank as much as he did. His body felt like it was burning from the inside out. Eating would have helped him through the pain, but he did not care.

"His soul was trying to kill him, while the cycle he was going through was keeping him alive to have a child. Those two aspects fought each other constantly, and because of that Sam became ill and lost an immense amount of weight, but did not die, as he should have.

"Because he is so underweight, he is eating fatty foods, in order to bulk up again, in preparation for the child his body is demanding he create." Dean looked like he finally understood what was happening.

"So it doesn't matter that Sam's a dude, he's still going to be able to have this kid he wants?" Castiel nodded and watched the color drain from Dean's face.

"He will be just fine Dean; nothing can harm an angel's mate once the bond is completed." Dean nodded, not completely believing what he was hearing.

"Will I go through that with you?" Dean asked, looking up with slight hope and fear in his eyes. "You may, yes." Castiel said and walked over to his hunter, bending down to kiss Dean gently on the lips.

"Wait a minute." Dean said, breaking the kiss and hoping Bobby let it slide.

"What did Gabriel mean I'm not to bother him no matter what I hear?" Castiel looked a little scared to answer, but he would never keep anything from Dean.

"The process to impregnate is very painful, and should you disrupt them, the process will not be completed and Sam could suffer consequences." Dean nodded.

"Tell them to go somewhere else then, I won't be able to stop myself if Sam's in pain." Castiel nodded and with a whoosh he was gone.

XXX

Gabriel and Sam appeared in the room and immediately be attacked each other's lips. Things were getting heated, with Sam moaning into the kiss when Castiel invaded their personal space and cleared his throat.

"What do you want brother?" Gabriel asked, sounding annoyed.

"Dean sent me to tell you it would be wise to relocate for this since he will be unable to stop himself from intervening should Sam be in any pain." Gabriel sighed but nodded and with a whoosh Sam and Gabriel were gone.


	5. It's what you wanted

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sam won't budge on the topic and no matter the pain, he will do what he can to make Gabriel happy.

When Sam's head stopped spinning he looked around at the room he was in and gasped. They were in a beautifully furnished room, decorated in black and red, but done so in an elegant way. The only window in the room was covered by red curtains, pulled apart slightly to let the light of the late morning in, making the room bright and cheerful. The walls were a classic white that brought some brightness to the room.

The floor was lush black carpeting that made Sam want to wiggle his toes for hours into the fibers, sighing at the fluffy texture; the wardrobe that had been pushed to the side was black in color, but contrasted well with the red curtains that danced around it with the light breeze flowing through the room.

The bed was king size, which looked huge in comparison to the room, with black and red covering that looked velvety soft, and so many pillows that you could melt into.

"You like?" Gabriel asked seeing the look on his mate's face.

Sam nodded not trusting his voice, and turned towards Gabriel, wanting to kiss him only to be stopped by an outward hand.

"I have to let you know now, if you want this then I am willing to give it to you, because god only knows how badly I want a child, but the process will be painful, and you will be begging me to stop. I won't be able to stop Sam, if I do, you could die."

Sam contemplated this a bit, truly thought it over. His body was screaming at him to create a life with his bonded and Sam so wanted to listen to it.

He'd never been intimate with a guy before and that in and of itself was terrifying to him, but this was Gabriel, someone he knew inside and out, thanks to the bond; someone he could trust with his very life, as had become apparent when Gabriel had died for him.

"How are we bonded, when we've barely even kissed?" Sam asked suddenly, not really knowing how it was possible.

"We are not bound flesh to flesh, Sam, we are bound Grace to soul. That is deeper and filled with more love than a physical bond. The physical bond comes next, which we will do before the conception process." Sam looked a little more relaxed at hearing this.

"How is that done?" Sam asked, a little more eager to get things going.

"By the exchange of blood." Sam looked scared at that, but was reassured quickly by a sweet kiss from Gabriel.

"You have to be sure this is what you want Sam." Sam nodded then and leaned into Gabriel.

"I want you." And that was all the consent Gabriel needed.

With sudden force Gabriel grabbed Sam's neck, turning the hunters head in order to have better access before burying his face in Sam's neck and breathing in the unique scent the cycle had given to him.

Sam gasped at the sudden movement but let Gabriel do what needed to be done. The hairs on the back of his neck stood on end as he felt Gabriel exhale.

Gabriel swiped his tongue out and licked at Sam's neck, earning himself a small moan from the hunter, before biting down on Sam's neck. Sam cried out at the pain, but he didn't move away, knowing this had to be done. Gabriel continued to bite down until he tasted the coppery tang of blood, and he sucked greedily at it, consuming as much as he could without hurting the other man too much.

Once Gabriel was finished drinking, he pulled away and looked at the mark he'd left behind, satisfaction filling him as he saw the wound begin to heal. He looked up at Sam then and smiled, knowing it would be like pulling teeth to get Sam to drink some of his blood, so he improvised and silently, without alerting the hunter, he bit his tongue hard enough to draw blood, and moved to kiss his mate.

Sam immediately opened his mouth to the kiss and was assaulted with the all too familiar taste of blood and started panicking. He tried to pull away only to have Gabriel hold him still and feed him more blood, until the hunter had drank the required amount.

Sam pulled away harshly then; fear evident on his face but Gabriel smiled reassuringly at him and closed the distance between them for another kiss.

They pulled apart gently this time and Gabriel was happy to see light shining in his hunter's eyes. "You will start to heal now." Gabriel dead panned and smiled at the confused look on Sam's face.

"What?" Sam sounded oh so sophisticated.

"I'm an arch angel; I have the ability to heal everything wrong with me in a matter of minutes. My body will never change because my grace won't let it, and now you have part of my abilities, thanks to the blood you drank." Sam frowned at Gabriel, about to yell at the angel for forcing blood on him.

"Three things before you yell at me. First you need to know that the blood you drank was needed for us to complete our physical bond, like I told you, second, the blood will help your body return to normal sooner, and third, this isn't demon blood, this is angel blood and you won't get addicted and there won't be any weird side effects." Sam nodded slowly, knowing Gabriel had no reason to lie.

"By sooner you mean?" Sam asked looking hopeful.

"I mean days instead of months." Sam sighed in relief, he hated how he looked now, all skinny and sickly, he was looking forward to looking like he had, healthy and strong.

"If you want to heal faster and get back to your old self you can always drink more of my blood." Sam shook his head. He didn't want to fall into that habit again, even though Gabriel had assured him he wouldn't get addicted.

"The hard part's coming up, you can back out now." Gabriel said, not wanting to cause Sam anymore pain than was needed.

"I'm not backing out. I want this, and I want you." Gabriel let out a small sigh before lowering Sam onto the bed and moving up to kiss the hunter soundly. Sam was lost in that kiss and moaned softly as he felt Gabriel's hands under his shirt, pulling the fabric up and over his head.

Gabriel worked his way down Sam's body, making sure to kiss every inch of skin he passed before stopping at Sam's lower abdomen. Gabriel placed soft gentle kisses to the flat stomach, hoping to ease Sam's nerves.

Sam looked down at Gabriel and smiled whole heartedly before nodding his consent again; knowing Gabriel was still worried over this.

Nodding, Gabriel moved his hands and placed them on Sam's stomach, concentrating on what he wanted to do, guiding his grace into place.

Sam took a deep breath and held it in, feeling a sudden warmth making its way into his stomach. Gabriel looked up at Sam then, looking worried, but did not stop what he was doing. The process had started and he wouldn't be able to stop.

Pushing more grace into his mate's abdomen, Gabriel focused and willed the bones of Sam's hips to move and widen.

Sam groaned in pain, but tried not to move, not wanting to make this harder on Gabriel than it need to be. Gabriel pushed more grace in, speeding up the process, not wanting Sam to suffer for long.

The bones of Sam's hips started widening with a sickening pop, and Sam screamed then, trying to move away from the pain. "Sam, I need you to stay still." Gabriel said gently, kissing Sam's chest as he spoke. Sam nodded, shaking a bit and hoping the pain would stop soon.

Finally, after what felt like hours, the pain started ebbing away, leaving a dull ache in its wake. "I'm sorry." Gabriel said, no longer wanting to do this, but not able to stop.

Sam shook his head and waved away the apology. He wanted this, regardless of the pain. "I'm not done I'm afraid." Sam shook his head. He didn't care. He didn't need an explanation; he needed it to be over soon.

Gabriel continued to pour Grace into his mate and watched Sam's eyes widen, before the hunter let out a blood curdling scream, feeling like his insides were on fire, but Gabriel didn't let up, needing to finish what he started.

Twenty minutes of screaming later, and Gabriel removed his hands, looking up at Sam with heavy eyes. "I'm so sorry it hurt you." Gabriel said crawling up to kiss Sam's open lips. Sam was glad for the distraction and pushed his tongue into Gabriel's mouth, moaning softly. It had hurt quite a bit, but now instead of pain there was a dull ache that was subsiding more as the kiss deepened.

Gabriel broke the kiss and looked at Sam with kind eyes, before making his way down, making sure to kiss at the sensitive mark he had left. Sam was gasping and moaning as he felt Gabriel's hot lips all over his body, hands touching him in so many places, making him writhe in pleasure, the pain all but forgotten.

Gabriel continued to make his way downward, relishing in the noises the hunter was making, and stopped at Sam's hips, kissing them with fervor, knowing the pain he had caused the hunter. Sam sighed in pleasure before a cold chill made him shiver.

Looking down Sam blushed. They were both naked, and Gabriel was looking at him with more love than Sam had ever seen directed towards him. "You're starting to look healthier already." Gabriel said, licking his way lower and towering over Sam's hardening cock, and smiling wolfishly at his mate. "Brace yourself." Gabriel warned, before taking all of Sam in one go, causing Sam to widen his eyes, and groan.

Not having a gag reflex was by far the better part of doing this for Gabriel. He wanted to shower as much pleasure as he could towards his mate, knowing how much discomfort was going to follow. Bobbing his head up and down and using his tongue in so many imaginative ways, Gabriel watched Sam bite at his hand trying to stifle the sounds he was making.

Sucking slightly, Gabriel hastened his pace, trying to bring his hunter to completion before moving onto the next step and his efforts were rewarded with a strangled cry and Sam's essence filling his mouth.

Gabriel swallowed it all greedily, wanting none of it to go to waste, before sitting up and smiling at his mate. "You like?"

Sam nodded, panting slightly. "It was good." Gabriel looked pleased.

"What I'm going to do next is going to be very uncomfortable. If you don't want to know, do not look down." Sam nodded and closed his eyes, waiting and listening.

At first all he heard was a snap of Gabriel's fingers followed by moans and groans coming from Gabriel. Risking a look, Sam opened his eyes and immediately blushed as he watched Gabriel pleasuring himself. Not really knowing what Gabriel was up to, Sam closed his eyes again and relaxed his head.

Sam was loving the sounds Gabriel was making, and was enjoying hearing them, finally having relaxed, but before he knew it, Gabriel was touching his legs, maneuvering them this way and that until his legs were leaning back and spread apart.

Soon he felt Gabriel's finger at his entrance and stiffened a bit. "You need to relax Sam; I promise it won't hurt much." Sam nodded and relaxed his body, waiting for the pain to start. He had a feeling he wasn't going to like what was happening.

Gabriel's finger worked its way into Sam's opening and Sam gasped in discomfort. It wasn't completely painful, but it wasn't pleasant either.

Gabriel worked his finger into Sam's opening and searched for the bundle of nerves that would have Sam come undone, and knew he'd found it when Sam let out a shuttering moan.

"I'm glad you like." Gabriel said, continuing his ministrations until Sam was comfortable and relaxed again. "This is where it gets awkward." Gabriel said, moving his finger away from Sam's sweet spot and continued to search.

Sam felt a little disappointed at the loss but knew Gabriel was doing something more important.

Sam grunted suddenly, as Gabriel found something inside him, something he didn't know he had and began fiddling with it, moving his finger from side to side.

"It's a secondary opening, this leads to the uterus I made for you, it will close up once you become pregnant." Gabriel explained, using his finger to open up the new passage.

Sam was all sensation again, everything was so overwhelming, he hated not knowing what was happening but he bared with it, knowing his body would continue to rebel unless he gave into the calling.

Suddenly Sam felt something enter him, something thin, long and cold, and squeezed his eyes shut against the feeling. And just as soon as the feeling had come, it was gone.

"And we're done." Gabriel said, snapping his fingers again and smiling up at Sam. Sam smiled, not wanting to feel anything quite like that ever again, and beckoned Gabriel to come closer so they could both bask in each others warmth.

Gabriel, not being one to deny his love anything, made his way up to Sam and cuddled next to his hunter, petting the taller man's hair and listening to Sam's breathing even out as the hunter fell asleep.

XXX

Dean was pacing a hole into the ground. Sam and Gabriel had been gone for hours, and he was starting to get worried.

Castiel watched his hunter with amusement, as for the twelfth time that day Dean turned and asked him where the other were.

"They are in the process of creating life, it takes a while and you need to be patient." Dean growled at Castiel but just like every other time he'd asked the question, continued to pace.

A whoosh caught his attention then, and Dean looked up to see a very healthy looking Sam and a smirking Gabriel standing just outside the living room.

"Where the hell have you two been? I was worried SICK!" Sam gave Dean one of his patented bitch faces.

"We were busy Dean, now shut up. Gabriel, I'm hungry." Gabriel nodded and snapped a hotdog into Sam's hand, watching the hunter devour it in two bites.

"So has it been done?" Castiel asked, looking at Gabriel curiously.

Gabriel's face broke out into the biggest smile anyone had seen him have and he nodded. "Yeah, I just checked before we left. We're going to have a baby."


	6. Pie saves the world.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dean gets a set of explanations, Sam discovers his sweet tooth and they both realize that Pie might not be as almighty as Dean keeps insisting.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all so much for your support and I'm soooooo sorry that I haven't updated in a while. I don't even know why, seeing as how the whole of it is already written so updating is no more than copy paste. Lol.

Dean looked pale at the news but he walked over and gave Sam a hug, wanting to support his brother through the transitions his body was undoubtedly going to go through.

"I'm happy for you." Dean whispered, knowing how much his support meant to his brother.

"Thank you Dean, and I'm sorry." Dean waved away the apology and smirked at his brother.

"You are so the girl now." Sam rolled his eyes and shrugged.

"It was more technical and medical than it was passion and…" Dean held up his hand.

"I don't want to know…wait a minute…" Dean and Sam both looked at Gabriel then, wanting an answer.

"What?" The older angel asked.

"So what the hell did the cycle have to do with anything if you could have just, you know, did that and got me pregnant any old time?" Sam asked, looking a bit irritated.

"The cycle prevents you from losing the baby. Without the cycle the child would be seen as a threat to the body and killed off immediately after conception." Sam looked like he understood.

"So this cycle thing makes his body accept the baby?" Gabriel nodded then, happy the brothers had understood without further explanation.

"Okay, so who wants pie?" Dean asked, wanting to change the subject, he really didn't want to know more about this…whatever it was.

"I'd love some pie. Gabriel can I have some pie please?" Gabriel nodded and snapped his fingers but nothing happened.

"Losing your mojo?" Dean asked sarcastically.

"It's on the kitchen table you idiot." Sam beamed at the answer and ran towards the kitchen.

"His appetite seems to be better." Bobby commented standing and following the younger Winchester.

Dean followed the other hunters towards the kitchen, wanting to get a slice of the pie before it was all eaten.

"Sam looks very healthy, not quite as near death as he had been." Castiel said, walking over to Gabriel and placing a hand on the older angel's shoulder.

"We completed our physical bond." Gabriel said as way of explanation. Castiel smiled as warmly as he was able to, and patted Gabriel on the shoulder, hoping his brother would understand the meaning behind the gesture.

"Thank you Castiel. Your support means the world to me." Castiel shrugged.

"I have always wanted children, but it does not seem as though I am going to have any. At least this way there will be a child that I may spoil." Gabriel looked devastated at the news.

"Why do you think you won't have any?" Gabriel asked, hoping to be able to help.

Castiel said nothing as tears fell from his eyes. He was scared and felt so alone in his endeavor for a child he would never have.

"Castiel, answer me." Gabriel demanded, wanting to get to the bottom of this.

"Before our bond was completed, he went through both cycles. We lost our chance at a child the day his second cycle ended." Castiel finally spoke, tears streaming from his eyes.

"There is no way. He's way too young to have gone through both cycles." Gabriel sounded shocked. The cycles lasted for months at a time, and only ever came by within 10 years of the first. There was no way Dean had gone through both cycles.

"DEAN!" Gabriel called, wanting to test a theory.

Dean came running out of the kitchen; fork in hand, to glare at Gabriel. "What? I was eating." He said, not noticing the tears running down Castiel's face.

"I need to check something with you." Gabriel said before placing a hand on Dean's stomach and using his grace to look around.

Dean wanted to move away but for some reason he wasn't able to. Feeling the grace make its way through his body, starting at his stomach was unnerving to say the least. This grace felt foreign, not like Castiel's.

"FUCK!" Gabriel swore. This wasn't fair.

"What the hell was that about?" Dean asked, truly baffled now.

"Something made you go through both of your cycles in one go. You and Castiel won't be able to have any kids." Dean dropped the fork, his eyes widened and he looked ready to cry, but held it together rather well given the circumstances.

"But I want kids." Dean sounded like a kid asking for sweets.

"This entire time I've been putting up with a shit life because I KNEW one day that it would all be worth it and that I'd have the whole apple pie life…but now…" Dean walked over to Castiel and buried his face in the other's jacket, letting the tears spill.

Sam was walking over to them then, looking like he too might cry before a thoughtful look crossed his mind.

"Gabriel…can you check and see if I have another cycle?" Gabriel nodded and placed his hands on Sam's stomach, doing what he had done to Dean not too long ago.

"You have two more coming up." Gabriel said, looking a little more shocked than he had initially wanted to.

Castiel was trying to be happy for Gabriel and Sam, but he couldn't help feeling bitter about it.

"Can you…I don't know, give Dean one of my cycles?" Gabriel looked thoughtful.

"I've never heard of something like that happening...it's more something to do with the individual's body chemistry and hormones but I can try." Gabriel answered; moving one of his hands towards Dean, hoping what they were planning on doing would work. Castiel and Dean deserved to have a child of their own.

Using his grace, Gabriel started searching Sam's soul for the information he needed. Gabriel hadn't wanted to say anything but transferring a cycle was impossible, but maybe he would be able to cause Dean's cycle to trigger again.

"Why did you say I might go through the cycle if you knew it was impossible?" Dean asked, sounding so small and sad.

"I didn't want you to hurt." Castiel answered, wrapping his arms around Dean tighter. Dean buried his face into Castiel's jacket and continued to cry.

"I GOT IT." Gabriel looked absolutely ecstatic as he turned away from his mate and looked at Dean and Castiel entwined like they wanted to meld into one being.

"What?" Castiel asked, looking up at Gabriel but not letting Dean go.

"I can retrigger his cycles." Castiel looked hopeful at that.

"And how is that possible?" Gabriel shrugged.

"Well, Sam's still in his cycle, and will continue to be in it until the baby is born, now that he's pregnant. He and Dean have the same blood type. All it will take is a transfusion of blood and the hormones in Sam's blood will trigger Dean's cycle again." Dean looked up with hopeful eyes and a smirk made its way to his mouth.

"So what about a transfusion?" Gabriel let out a full belly laugh at that and smacked the hunter upside the head. "You have nine months to decide if you want your cycle back, so think it over and le…"

"I want it." Dean didn't even have to think it over. The thought of not being able to have a kid had terrified him, and he wasn't going to let that happen again.

Gabriel shrugged before snapping a syringe into existence. "Arm Sammy love." Sam lifted his arm and watched Gabriel draw some of his blood.

"Are you sure? Two pregnant Winchesters will be loads of fun, but are you sure?" Castiel laughed at Gabriel's hesitance but nodded, he wanted a child as badly as Dean did and this chance would not be wasted.

"Mkay, Dean-o I need your arm." Dean lifted his sleeve and handed his arm to Gabriel, watching the angel inject him with Sam's blood.

"This effects aren't going to be immediate, but by tomorrow you'll be good to go." Dean nodded, not really knowing what he was going to do next. Yes, he wanted to be a dad badly, but he was still terrified about the concept of carrying the kid. He wasn't the girliest of men and he sure as hell never thought about taking one for the team. The concept of how this was going to happen scared the SHIT out of him, but here he was, about to go through this cycle thing so his body wouldn't reject a baby he was clearly too terrified to carry.

"Let's go drink some tea and talk about this Dean. Gabe and Cas can entertain themselves." Sam suggested, seeing the fear that was clearly on his brother's face. Dean nodded and followed Sam into the kitchen, leaving the angels behind, hoping they had gotten the hint that they wished to be alone.

Bobby looked up from his coffee and immediately stood to leave knowing that Sam and Dean had something quite important to talk about.

"GABE?" Sam called out and an instant later they had two piping hot cups of tea waiting for them on the table.

"Take a seat." Sam suggested, sitting down and picking up his cup. Dean nodded and took a seat as well, looking down at his cup like it was a demon that needed to die.

"I'm an open book Dean, go ahead and ask." Sam said taking a tentative sip of his tea, hoping it didn't burn his tongue.

"What's it like?" Dean asked, grabbing another piece of pie and picking at it with his fork.

"Well, I haven't been pregnant long so I don't know about that, but it hurts." Dean nodded. Pain didn't bother him.

Taking a bite of his pie Dean looked up: "What happens?" Sam looked down at his own tea and sighed.

"Well first there's a lot of grace involved to get your body ready for the baby, and then the rest is literally medical rather than passionate. It's like artificial insemination, so it's really uncomfortable." Dean looked relieved at that. It wasn't that he didn't love Castiel enough to do something like that for him, it's just that he had never imagined having to do it, and the thought made him scared and uncomfortable.

"Some people aren't bottoms Dean, that's understandable. I don't think Castiel will be mad at you for it." Sam said, understanding the hesitation on Dean's face.

"But what if I freak out in the middle and punch him or something, or try to stop it and run screaming out of the room?" Sam chuckled a bit.

"You'll be screaming Dean, a lot. It's fine if you freak out, but you can't have him stop, it could kill you if the process isn't finished." Dean nodded; he'd heard Castiel say there were consequences to stopping the process.

"You know better than to put your life at risk just because you're freaking out. It's nothing to worry about; at the very least we can go through this together." Dean looked up with a smile then.

"Yeah we can huh, and if women are any indication, we can totally milk this for everything its worth." Sam laughed at that.

"You really do look a lot better Sammy, like you've gained 20 pounds over night." Sam blushed a bit.

"Yeah, well its part of the physical bond." Dean looked up and smirked.

"How did Gabriel get you to drink his blood? Knowing you, you probably freaked the hell out." Sam nodded.

"Yeah I freaked out. He bit his tongue and kissed me." Dean busted up laughing at that, almost choking on a bite of pie.

"That sneaky little bitch." Sam rolled his eyes at that.

"Yeah. I was pissed, until he explained that I'd get his healing ability from him, so I'll be looking more and more like I used to as the days go by." Dean looked happy to hear that.

"Wait a minute, how did you know about the physical bond?" Dean had the decency to look sheepish,

"Cas and I completed that about a year ago." Sam didn't want to know more, just that his brother hadn't been as thick headed as he had assumed.

"I want something sweet." Sam announced looking up at Dean who was giving him a curious stare.

"Dude, pie." Sam scoffed.

"Pie does not solve everything, and besides I still don't like pie so…GABE CANDY ME!" Sam heard a laugh before a bowl of candy appeared before him. "Perks of having an arch angel for a mate." Sam announced, grabbing a kit kat bar and opening it slowly.

"Hey Castiel is just as awesome, he's just not that big of a show off." Dean said grabbing at the candy Sam held.

Sam snatched it away with a glare before breaking the candy into pieces and throwing one towards Dean.

With a smile the older hunter took a bite of the candy and watched his brother devouring the rest in maybe three bites.

"You need to slow down your eating, you could get indigestion." Sam glared but actually started taking smaller bites of the snickers he'd picked up.

"If you want candy, the bowl is right there, I'm not stopping you, stop eyeing my snickers." Dean laughed and took a good drink of his tea, banging it on the table and watching it refill.

"You're right Sammy, having your angel around is very useful

XXX

Gabriel sighed as he snapped his fingers to refill the tea and looked at Castiel. "I love them but so help me dad I feel used." Castiel laughed a little.

"You have impregnated a Winchester, you are going to be used until the day that child is old enough to leave the nest." Gabriel nodded, he knew Castiel was right, but he couldn't bring himself to care.

"As I said, I love them." Castiel nodded and looked over at Bobby, who was trying to busy himself with a book and failing so very badly.

"Bobby, we'll move out as soon as I get the house in order, so please bear with it." Bobby grunted before looking up with a glare on his face.

"I'm worried about those idjits, this has nothing to do with me wanting you all to leave." Gabriel didn't completely believe that.

"You need a woman in your life." Bobby laughed at Gabriel's tone of voice.

"About five months ago I'd have said the same thing about the boys in the kitchen." Gabriel shrugged.

"Sexuality was never meant to be discriminated against; to the eyes of my father every relationship is sacred, as it should be." Bobby looked up at that.

"I'm not against it you moron, I'm saying its unexpected is all." Gabriel wasn't completely sure about that but he let it drop. He wasn't about to start an argument with the older hunter, it wasn't worth the headache it would cause.

Another snap of his fingers and Castiel looked up intrigued.

"More pie." He said as way of explanation.

"I swear if it wasn't for the bond those two could easily become obese through the duration of their pregnancies." Castiel nodded but didn't seem to care. He would love Dean regardless, and come tomorrow they were going to be expecting their own little child, which made him so very happy.


End file.
